I can relate....

Here are some lyrics that I heard yesterday.....lyrics that I definately can relate to. Maybe you can to:

A place to spend my quiet nights, time to unwind
So much pressure in this life of mine, I cry at times
I once contemplated suicide, and woulda tried
But when I held that 9, all I could see was my momma's eyes
No one knows my struggle, they only see the trouble
Not knowin it's hard to carry on when no one loves you
Picture me inside the misery of poverty
No man alive has ever witnessed struggles I survived
Prayin hard for better days, promise to hold on
Me and my dawgs ain't have a choice but to roll on

Why do these lyrics ring so true to me? Why can I relate to them? It seems to me that my life is full of these thoughts and feelings like this. I don't quite understand where they come from, but I do know that they are there. Oh and trust me, they are there. Weighing heavy, draining me of all energy and hope and love and just about everything else. I hate it. It seems one day everything can be fine and then the next day - life is hell again. I don't get it. I just don't get it. I thought things were on a upswing, but now I only see the process, making its rounds through my life.

I thought about posting some of my poetry that I have written when I have been "down." But after contemplating on that, I decided that the shock value would be too high for most of you and you would probably freak out. Too bad. It really reveals my inner struggles. However, I have another poem that I would like to share with you from a friend:

I Cry

Sometimes when I'm alone
I Cry,
Cause I am on my own.
The tears I cry are bitter and warm.
They flow with life but take no form
I Cry because my heart is torn.
I find it difficult to carry on.
If I had an ear to confiding,
I would cry among my treasured friend,
but who do you know that stops that long,
to help another carry on.
The world moves fast and it would rather pass by.
Then to stop and see what makes one cry,
so painful and sad.
And sometimes...
I Cry
and no one cares about why.
- Tupac Shakur

Make fun of me all you want for reading poetry by 2pac. Make fun of me all you want for listening to his music and proclaiming that behind Jesus, he has had the most impact on my life. Make fun all you want. Because you can not be this real. You can not write the words that he has written. You can not say things that echoe in my heart. He does - and he does it well.

This man was a lyrical genious. Like it or not - its the truth. I hope my poetry will one day speak to others that go through these times of hell. Maybe, just maybe, I will impact them like he has impacted me.

laugh if you want - but to me it's no laughing matter - it's life.......