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I feel like I should respond to a comment that was left a couple of days ago. The comment said that I was contradictory amongst other things. I would like to take a couple of minutes and reply back to that person and anyone else who might be thinking the same thing.

True that my blog is called - Ravished. True that my blog’s subtitle is “The heart longs for pursuit. A pursuit after God. To be like His son. To walk in His ways. The question is how hard will I pursue and will I pursue at all?”
There is no denying that.

It was said that my life is filled with irony - if one only knew how much truth there is in that statement. But to come to think about it - isn’t everybody’s life filled with irony? Aren’t we all just a stumbling, mumbling, bumbling ball of confusion and irony? My life has always been full of irony. The dictionary defines irony (among other definitions) as “Incongruity between what might be expected and what actually occurs” - reading that - I will definitely agree that my life is full of irony. I am expected to read my bible - to pray - to go to church - to do all these “righteousness earning” deeds. But yes I have found in the last month or so (having struggled with this for longer) that it does not “actually occur.” I feel like most of us are like that - struggling with what is expected and what actually occurs. I believe that is the great irony of the Christian walk - we are always falling despite the call to us to be holy just as He is holy.

My life has been tattered and bruised by the marks of disease. If I had to put words around this struggle, it would be Severe Depression - although there is much more to it. This disease that I constantly battle is a living hell. Like it or not - that is the truth. Although my heart longs to be ravished by God and to constantly pursue Him - the truth is that I am often sidetracked and yes even ravished by this depression and all that goes with it. The truth is that we are all ravished - by something or in most cases many things. I have been in a constant pursuit to be ravished by God - but I must admit that I have never been solely ravished by Him - nor do I think that there will ever be a time in my life where this will be - until the day that I am finally with Him.

Overboard? Yes that does seem to be a vein that runs in the body of this ragamuffin. Fortunately, this going overboard can often be a blessing. But you are right - it can often be a curse as well. I have a heart that says its either all or nothing at all. That is my heart - full of passion - whether it be right or wrong remains unseen.

Pursuing God. Resting in God. I am not sure that I see the problem here. I don’t see these as two enemies but more like two long time friends who often come along with each other. When I say pursue - I am not sure what is going through your mind or what you interpret that to mean. Your words make me think that you think it is a bad thing. I sure hope not - it was Jesus who said follow me. It was Jesus who said all that shall come after me - it was…..well I could go on. My heart must constantly pursue Him and His glory - just as I am to rest in Him and His everlasting love. I don’t think resting in God is wrong - I just don’t think that it is all there is to this God thing.

I am sorry that my life is a contradiction and full of irony. But it is. It will probably always be that way. However, I do believe that if you would look just a little closer - you would see your life full of irony as well. But then again - maybe not.

Until then.........

Dreams......

Well thought that I would leave you with another one of my "works" - until next time


At times - dreams
Seem
To fade
Like the closing of the day.
They come and go
Easy to stray.
These elusive dreams fade
Away
Leaving them for you to recreate.
There is no way
To make
Them remain
So you’re left to pretend
That they will never end.
You begin
To befriend
Thoughts to comprehend
Of when
You will again
Formulate more dreams and then
Contend
To defend
The new hopes that are born within.
You fear that they too
Will flee from you
Then what will you do?
Will you pursue
To renew
Your views
Or choose
To lose
Or refuse
To continue.
Dreams can be such a funny game.
They can bring fame
Or shame
Upon your name.
You wonder if they are in vain
And ascertain
Whether disdain
Is part of the gain.
You try to maintain
Some kind of vision
That keeps you wishing
And reminiscing
For dreams that have been
On your mind every now and again.